Can I Borrow a Feeling? Who's Really in Charge...You or Your Emotions?

The Greatest Generation was a generation defined by thier sacrifice, dedication and emotional maturity. History teaches us that one of The Geatest Generation's examples was their combined subjugation of emotion for the betterment of the country. This generation worked hard and sacrificed unnecessary pleasures for the betterment of the country. They gave life, limb, family and comfort for the rest of us. We still benefit today from the actions of this generation.

In our day and age the lessons of this generation would be very beneficial for us to remember. Today we Facebook, Tweet and Pin our emotions as if we worship them. "Feeling argh..." "Feeling sad..." "Feeling grrr..." You've seen the posts. Worse yet, you've seen the people whose lives are ruled and run by their emotions. We've gotten so good at not only expressing every emotion, but justifying them as well. "I know, right!?" "You SHOULD feel like that!"

Stephen R. Covey taught in his book "Principle Centered Leadership" that there are several "center" options for our life - family center, religion center, career center, emotion center etc. Ultimately, if we want a life that fulfills our needs and wants while contributing to the greater good we would do well to center our lives around a set of principles that we value. That way, our lives are driven by an unchangeable core and yet are flexible in execution and application when needed.

I'm not sure when, how or why we moved toward a more self-centered, ME, emotion driven cultural shift but it concerns me. Emotion drives life far too often. This leaves the emotionally driven person in the passenger seat of thier lives wondering "where all the drama comes from," "why they can't get on top of their lives" and "why life has to be so hard."

The mature leader has, at some point come to the realization that emotions should be the tool, the car rather than the driver of the car. To illustrate this point follow this simple exercise. Write down ALL of the emotions you feel in one week. After your list reaches a certain length and you see the difference between all emotions you feel you come to realize that if you let your emotions run you rather than you controlling and using them you will lead a pretty exhausting life. 

The next step may be one of the most powerful pieces to the puzzle. Put a star by or highlight the emotions you want to feel on a regular basis and feel with more intensity. Once you've chosen your list you now have the choice to create your life to feel those emotions more, or to continue to let your emotions run you. 

Ultimately, either through conscious choice, or lazy non-choice you are choosing. You are the driver. You know how to create the emotions and you chose your focus. Where will those choices lead you? You ARE the driver.

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